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Holding back is hard to do...
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07 June 2002
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I did my best--my very very best. I really wanted to keep two of my students, but dagnabit, their parents wouldn't let me.
In all seriousness, one of the rough parts of this otherwise wonderful job is the fact that I must assess the progress of each and every student and upon that information, decide whether or not they are promoted to the next grade level.
Retention is no fun, no matter how you look at it. However, as a teacher, I cannot, in good conscience, send a student who is not capably working at a third-grade level to fourth grade. I completely understand why parents might not be hip to the idea, but retention does serve a purpose.
There are students for whom retention would do absolutely little to help them--the ones who choose to not work up to their capabilities. Sometimes the threat of retention is enough to get their little hinders in gear. Sometimes, it's not enough and they must repeat the year. Hey, if they don't do it this year, and their skills reflect it, then another year at that grade is the only thing that student has earned.
If a student chooses to not do the work and they are fortunate enough to learn the skills anyway, then, well, I guess it's up to the teacher.
If the student tries, albeit not their hardest, and their skills are at least a year behind grade level, then retention must be considered.
I had two students in the last category. It's not that they didn't try; it's that no matter how hard they tried, they fell further and further behind. It's really sad to see students who are struggling like that. I don't want to hold students back. I want to see them succeed.
It's such a conundrum for me. On one hand, I can completely understand why a parent wouldn't want their child to repeat a grade. It's a conception that their child will be mercilessly teased and tormented by other students. Who would want that for their child? However, I don't see that happening very often. Perhaps it was a problem in the past. Perhaps it is a problem in other schools, but at my school there is little peer retribution for having to repeat a grade.
In fact (and on the other hand), what I see in students who are retained is a renewed self esteem when they begin their repeated year with a prior knowledge of some of the content. It gives them that extra edge, and it makes such a difference in their academic output. It's amazing.
I didn't succeed in retaining the students for whom I thought it would benefit. All I can do is hope that they are late bloomers and everything kicks in next year. As of now, their skills are more than a year behind. The difference between third and fourth grade is a great one. Expectations are even higher in what they are able to do independently.
I have faith in our teachers, though, and I know that even if they were socially promoted, the teachers in the upcoming years will do their very best to do what is best for each student.
In all honesty, I really would have enjoyed having both of those students in my class again! They are little dolls.
I love my job, but at times it is quite heartbreaking. ;-)
Today is the anniversary of my older sister, Tonya. I can't believe it. She is only one year older than I am, but she is celebrating her 16th anniversary. Yes, 16th!!! Oh my gosh, how weird is that?!?!
5 school days left! One more week!
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